Greg Schmidt


Me, in my prize-winning "sunburned tourist" Hallowe'en costume.

Look closely, and you'll notice the burn-free sunglasses zone around my eyes, and the sock marks. You may also note that I was "asleep on my back" while getting this "burn", and so the backs of my arms and legs appear, in comparison, to be that same healthy shade of white commonly associated with the "didn't survive" actors in Titanic. It was this attention to detail which won it for me.

The red is a shade of lipstick known as "Red to Remember". (And boy, will I remember!) I knew I was going to be in trouble when every woman who found out it was lipstick said "Oh My God". (Men typically said "Cool" or some such.)

Although my face and hands washed clean the next day, I was wearing long sleeved shirts for a week after, and it was several days after that before the colour was gone from my legs.

Moral: Lipstick is for lips.